So yesterday was super fun. Got up early, Zack’s parents came over to watch Sam, and we were off to the doctor! Baby check up (strong heartbeat! I gained too much weight again, argh! My blood pressure was high, yay!) and then I got my flu shot (didn’t feel it at all, but now it’s achey, of course) and THEN I got to take my glucose test (which honestly, was super easy and not a big deal- just tastes like a sicky sweet melted orange popsicle). Fingers crossed I don’t have gestational diabetes on top of everything else, because I don’t think I could handle that right now. No, I know I couldn’t.
And then we got home and Sam threw his very first legit straight-up TEMPER TANTRUM- there was marching involved, it was actually kind of hilarious- and even refused to read a book before his nap, which he has never done, and then finally went down, and I sat down in the living room and just lost it. Gosh, I’ve been feeling so much weight lately, and I thought I was better- I thought I was at peace with everything, but more things came at me today than I was ready for, and I just felt so… small. So helpless. And I felt the weight of having absolutely nothing in my control.
And that is a tough pill to swallow.
Especially whilst pregnant. These hormones are no joke, people!
And so I let it all out. I let out my pent-up frustration and sadness and overwhelming feelings of helplessness. And damn, it felt good.
If you ask me if I’m okay, I am! I really am. I’m not lying when I say that. I know that God has me in His hands, I know that this Baby is happily growing in my tummy right now- strong and sweet and all of those little kicks I’m getting so frequently now? They make my world. They are my reassurance that everything will be okay. So yes, I am okay.
But sometimes, mama just needs to let it all out.
And also, that shirt up there doesn’t lie. Mama could reallyyyyy use a Chardonnay right now. ;)
How do you let out frustration/stress?
I love your shirt it’s so cute! I used to run to let out my frustration until I hurt my knee. Now I try to do cardio or a short jog!
I am in my first trimester with my first baby and I have been feeling all of the same emotions. It is overwhelming. I have definitely had a good cry every few days and then I feel a lot better.
I’ve been following your blog for almost a year now and it’s nice to feel connected to other mamas out there while you’re stuck at home, so thank you for sharing! Just wanted to send you a little love, I know the feeling of not being in control while pregnant with a crazy toddler! My little ones are 3months and 25months and it’s hard work everyday! I usually let out my frustrations when my poor husband gets home and sometimes it involves tears… I’m so grateful for my boys and all the excitement they bring to my life, but it’s so easy to lose it when I’m in the moment and my two year old is testing my patience every five minutes ;) Those temper tantrums are pretty funny though! And thank god for wine and margaritas on those particularly bad days!
I’m so sorry you had a rough day! I’ll be praying for you and your sweet baby! On a side note: temper tantrums are the worst! We started dealing with them with my son around 18 months and he will be 2 this weekend with no signs of ending the tantrums. I’m hoping he is just going through the “terrible twos” early. Blah! It is challenging, but this too shall pass!
temper tantrums are SO much fun. Deep breaths, right? some times they are hilarious and cute. Then there are the times they aren’t… LOL
I’m so sorry you are feeling so out of it right now. I love that you recognize the hormones in you being out of whack. You’re doing such a great job growing a little person, eating right, exercising and taking good care of you. Don’t second guess…just move forward.
Ugh, so sorry you had a rough day! I swear they need a pill for pregnancy hormones because they make everything like 1000x worse. It’s totally good to cry it out though. Better than keeping it all bottled up! I sooo miss those baby kicks! That’s gotta be one of the best feelings in the world! Fingers crossed your glucose test went fine!!!
Those pregnancy hormones are not to be joked with! Let it out, lady! When I was pregnant with my first little girl, I once actually burst into legit tears when I called to cancel a credit card I didn’t want. Actual. tears. I am sure that that call is used in their customer service training re: how to deal with crazies. Don’t worry! Happy to hear about those sweet little kicks!
Cheri @ Overactive Blogger
I too threw a tempter tantrum today. I couldn’t get the stupid ice maker back into the freezer and yelled for like 10 full minutes. Not proud of that one.