I’ve been thinking lately about being a mom.
Ooh boy, I know. Brace yourself.
It’s challenging and can be overwhelming sometimes. There is so much out there, telling you to do this, to not do this, you should be doing this, you should never do that. And as a first time mom, while pregnant, everyone is so quick to tell you all of this advice. Even as a second time mom, or third time, or whatever it may be. It seems that pregnant belly really welcomes a whole lot of unsolicited advice.
Well, you want to know my number one piece of advice? One that I would give to any and all pregnant women? Don’t listen to all of the advice! ;)
My best friend told me this while I was pregnant with Sam, and it has since stuck with me, and especially now that I’m on the other side of pregnancy, two times over, I see just how true it is:
Listen to your instincts.
There is SO MUCH INFORMATION out there, all of it contradicting itself, and when it boils down to it, the most important thing you can do as a mother is to do what you think is right. And yeah, you may fail sometimes. And yeah, it may not work out. But then you regroup and you try something else.
See, the thing about babies is they’re resilient. They can handle it. Plus, honestly, they’re not going to remember any of this, so if you do fail at something (as long as it isn’t anything majorly damaging) it’s really not a big deal in the grand scheme of things.
I don’t really know what I’m getting at here, except to say that I’ve been feeling all sorts of overwhelmed lately. And it’s all just so damaging and soul-crushing and, ugh. But you know what? Here’s the thing. It’s not the end of the world. I am NOT a failure. I am an incredible mother and what’s more is I am the perfect mother for my babies. And that is all that matters.
So here’s my advice, that I am taking from here on out. Trust your instincts. Stop reading so much. Never ever compare yourself to others. They say it because it’s true: Comparison truly is the thief of joy. You are doing an incredible job, and don’t let anybody tell you otherwise. :)
Katie, I have followed your blog for the last few years ,and I just want to say Thsnk You for being open and real! I’m a first time mom ( my son Asher was born December 21) and it is so tough/overwhelming some days. But I always feel encouraged reading your blog! So thanks for being you! Keep up the awesome job momma!!
Daphne, thank you so much for your comment!!! Wow, that is exactly why I post these kinds of posts- to encourage, to provide hopefully some inspiration and to let all of us know we are NOT alone! :) Thank you for following my blog and for always being so sweet, too!!
I absolutely love this! I have pretty much tuned out most advice during my pregnancy and gone off pure instinct and it has helped me so much! :)
YES, that is the only way to do it, Jen! Way to go!
This has been my biggest advice to other new moms, and I feel like I don’t have a ton of experience since I’m only 7 months in… but I have learned this through my breastfeeding journey and natural birth (that I didn’t think I could do!) to just relax and trust myself and my body. YOU know what is best for YOUR kids, which may not be the same thing thats best for other peoples’ kids, and that’s okay :) Thanks for sharing!
You are an amazing mama! I know it! And that is definitely the best advice, the same advice I would give too. I am a first time mom, my little guy is 3 months old. We all need to do what works best for us in our situations.
Oh my goodness, being pregnant has definitely showed me just how many opinions there are out there! Everyone has an opinion, whether they’ve had kids or not, and it’s so overwhelming! But my mom gave me that same advice that your friend did. She said to hear the advice and take it all as optional and that I will know which choices to make when the time comes. And I plan on taking that to heart when my little one is born.
And yes, you are an incredibly mom and your kids clearly adore you! Don’t listen to your doubt! :)
Well said mamma! You are the only blogger I read that has littles because I really appreciate yiur ipen and honest views on the ups and downs. You are doing a great job!!!
Spelling errors! Sorry! #momlife #typingwhilemommin
Someone also told me that when I was pregnant! Most definitely the best piece of advice I’ve received!
Girl AMEN. Mom life is hard enough without a million expectations (either from others or ourselves). At some point I feel like every mom realizes you just have to let go and let God. Love this post!
Katie! Where did you get your baby wearing wrap? If you have an affiliate link for it, I’ll buy one through ya. :) We have a Baby Bjorn but I think I’d much prefer a wrap for the next kid around. :)
Aw you’re so sweet!! This one is from Solly Baby (love them!) I also have and love Happy Baby, they’re a little cheaper but really great! Here’s my link for them: http://amzn.to/29LW7eJ :)
Totally. Do you listen to the podcast One Bad Mother? It’s a great encouraging listen… not about advice but about lifting up moms and commiserating in the hard times! I love it.
I really needed to read this today, thank you for being so real and open! It’s so hard to hear everyone’s options on how you should raise your children. I’m a first time mama (my son is 4 months old!) and no joke, people’s “advice” have caused me to have panic attacks and call the doctor for the smallest things. I’ve been struggling with anxiety and feeling overwhelmed since starting back work part time from home, it’s not easy being a mama but it sure is worth it.