I am lucky. I am blessed. I am also going through the absolute hardest thing that I have ever had to go through, and one of the hardest things I ever will have to go through in my life. And it sucks. Like, so much, you guys. I would never wish this on anyone; not my worst enemy. My mom was my best friend, and it kills me inside when I think about everything she won’t be here for. But I really can’t think of those things, because that’s when I shut off. That’s when I want to crawl into a ball and cry until I can’t find anymore tears, and am gasping for breath, and I just can’t do that. I don’t want to live like that. Cancer is a bitch. An absolute bitch. And I hate it. It makes me angry, it makes me sad, it makes my insides boil and my heart explode. But one day, none of this will matter. One day we will all be at peace and everything will be right. But until that day, I’m taking my sweet mom’s advice. I’m not going to throw a “pity party.” Not ever. I’m not going to ask myself “why?” because I’ll go insane. I’m going to remember to smile and remember to wake up every morning. I’m going to cherish every moment I get to spend with my darling husband and my incredible family and friends and I’m going to live life to the FULLEST. Because we just get this one. And it can be terribly short – tragically short- so let’s make the most of it, shall we?
xo
Katie, I know your Mom is watching over you and is so proud of the fact that you’re doing all you can to stay positive and cherish every moment instead of throwing a pity party! You are so loved!
Thank you so much, sweet girl. Your comment made me smile lots!
xo
Your Mom is watching over you!!! Hugs my dear dear friend!
Aw hugs to you, Jen!!
xo
*hugs*
Hugs back!!
xo
You have such a great attitude about things, even when its hard. Sending you positive vibes and definitely praying for you :)
Well, that attitude all came from my mom! I’m trying really hard! Thank you for your prayers <3
xo
I love your attitude and cancer really is a bitch. Stay positive! xoxo!
Thanks, girl! I’m trying <3
xo
That’s the spirit your strength inspires me .
xo Meg<3
Meghan Silva’s Blog
You are too kind for saying that. I’m not as strong as it may seem… but thank you.
xo
I lost my dad a few yrs ago in 2008 and Since then have been made to realise how short life is and live too for every moment. I cried over doing dishes tonight bc something brought up a memory of my dad. It will get easier but she will always be very close to you in memory and spirit. Even gone, people we lose are always in our hearts.
Been praying for you
Bonnie Rose | The Compass Rose
I’ve cried doing the dishes a few times already! I’m praying for you too, sweet girl. I love what you said: they will always be in our hearts <3
xo
Cancer is such a bitch. I hate it. I hate what it does to people and I hate that it took our moms. I try not to ask myself “why?” either but that doesn’t mean I don’t get angry when I think about all the things she won’t be here for. I just know there’s nothing I can do about it at this point. I’m going to miss her so much for the rest of my life and nothing will bring her back. But one thing I’ve learned through this is how to be so grateful to wake up and go to bed healthy each day and night.
You are so right about all of this!! And this just shows how truly strong you are! It takes a LOT to be as strong and positive as you have been through everything. Just know that and know that I’ve been thinking of you!!! Here’s to making every day count!!! xoxo
Ugh, I just love everything you said and I just love you.
xo
Katie,
I just want to tell you again how much this post inspires me to live better. You are going through such a huge loss and your positivity and strength in it all is incredible. This is really beautiful words to live by. It helps me remember to never take a moment or day for granted. Thank you for being such a inspiring strong woman. love ya, girl.
You are so sweet, girl. I’m so glad that this helped you, too <3
xo
Oh I just LOVE this! You inspire me every day, sweet girl! Your strength and outlook on life is so amazing! Keep that pretty little head up and keep sharing your great attitude. Love you!
xo
Oh, Julia, I am not always this strong and positive, but I’m trying so hard! Thank you, sweet girl. Love you!
xo
I’m so sorry girl! I lost my dad about 14 years ago this coming December from a brain tumor. I know how it is losing a parent. xoxoxo
I’m so sorry to hear about your dad, too, girl. Hugs <3
xo
Take care! I have been thinking about you!
xo Jodi
Thank you, Jodi. That’s so sweet <3
xo
I couldnt agree more! i would never want anyone to go through this! praying for you! stay strong!
XO
Thank you, Kiki.
xo
Sending prayers your way! And having a bad day is nothing to be ashamed of.
Sheree
The Hartungs Blog
thehartungs.blogspot.ca
Thanks, girl!
xo
Hi Katie! Just wanted to say I’ve loved reading through your blog :) I’m so sorry for your loss, I can’t even imagine…but I love that you are celebrating how awesome your mom clearly was. I’m sure the memorial was perfect and your mom would have loved it.
Annie
The Other Side of Gray
Aw thank you so much, Annie. <3 What sweet things to say!
xo
Just keep swimming, you will get through this and your mom would have wanted it that way! Heart, hugs and prayers to you lady!
Coffee Beans and Bobby Pins
Mary Nichol Handbag Giveaway!
Thank you so much, Amy <3
xo
This post is incredibly moving. I stumbled over this way and got hooked because we share a name (gotta love another friend named Katie!) and this post caught my eye. Keep on feeling what you gotta feel — cry if you want, laugh at memories if you want, throw something against the wall if you want. There’s nothing wrong with feeling whatever it is that you feel.
Aw thank you, Katie. You’re very sweet <3
xo